But before we get the honor, we are forced to witness the Idols karate chopping one another over a Ford Fiesta; Andrew's mom wrapped in a giant serape; Justin" the runt" Bieber ass kissing Seacrest; Usher forced to sing live (which was awful), while dancing in a ridiculous Charlie Chaplin chapeau; Katie crap her capris before being saved from the hacksaw for the 3rd week in a row and Sean Combs or whatever his name is this year, NOT sing live (this too was absolutely awful), while dancing with the ridiculous skank that slept with Mr. Sandra Bullock.
BUT, in the end they did it, America FINALLY sent Dud-i Home!! Rejoice!!
Last night I felt like I was on the Fiesta deck watching act after act of crappy lounge singers. The only difference is that I hadn't been able to go thru an enormous buffet, sip a watered down daiquiri and sit with Captain Stubing before watching this crap. This season is SO lacking in personality and originality. Even our favorites are pretty average.
Was an Inglorious Bastard at the judges table tonight? Oh, that was just Ellen dressed in heinous grey military coat. Nice shout out to the Third Reich, and on Passover no less!
Usher has one love in his life...USHER. I mean seriously Ush, you can't take your stupid f'ing glasses off during an EVENING taping of the show? Get over yourself, you haven't had a hit since you were dating Chili so give us all a break.
During rehearsal I thought I watching an episode of Square Pegs...well, am I right or what??
Shioban was AWFUL today...the scream she THINKS is so amazing sounded like a lynx getting hit with a hot poker. Punky Brewster has a very high sense of herself in this competition and got knocked down tonight ,which I think is a GOOD thing. Do you think she will finally give us a break on this screeching thing next week?
Casey took some opiates tonight or Miley Cyrus was still back stage and had just given him a happy ending. That guy wouldn't get the shit eating grin off his face. As you all know, I want to get this guy naked and bed him, BUT he's pretty boring. Boring schmoring, he's hot and lets be honest, good looks get you far in this world so he's not going anywhere soon.
Indiana Arie...what can I say about this guy. I love the big fella.
I think I saw Usher laughing hysterically by the potted palm behind the piano as he listened to Tim. Hey Tim, when Usher told you to look in the camera, he didn't mean open your eyes like a blind man without his blue blockers and STARE into the camera for 5 minutes. You really are a complete idiot.
Taco Time was great. Loved it! His mom looked like she had an entire zebra hide wrapped around her bosoms. Judging my the giant serape tonight, I just think she must have enormous gazunga's she's trying to hide. Just a thought.
HAAA, Ushers comment about Katie being "potentially good" was hilarious and brutal. Why don't you just say it, you suck little white gurrrrrl. I guess America agreed with Simon's take on her...Sorry Kara, you really are worthless.
Ahhhh, Brazilian Chin...I felt like I was my Polish waxist tonight. Looking at that damn facial hair I feel I'm looking at a well groomed porn star's nether regions. Although it's shrinking, it just feels like it's gone from the 80's to 90's. Come into the 2000's and go bare baby!!
Besides that I think Lee KILLED it tonight. Casey may be hot, but I think that Lee has the whole package. His rap sheet makes him dirty hot. Grrrrrr!
Crystal is the bomb, but she dresses like a courtesian from the frickin' Tudors. Either that or Bambi, the head stripper at Deja Vu off the i-94 Hammond Exit. Get the wardrobe together sister, fast!
Poor man's Justin Bieber is going to screw me since I have him going this week. There is NO chance he's leaving anytime soon now that he will be the only guy left under the age of 21 once Tim bounces next week. Damn you Million Dollar Baby face, damn you!
This is really a double farewell because I think we see the writing on the wall for Tim. Here's my prediction...by year's end, Didi and Tim will be signed. Yep, that's right, signed by Carnival Cruises to work the Xtapa route for the 65+ crowd. Don't worry Tenille, The Captain is right behind you!! Bon Voyage suckaz!
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